Saying goodbye to Bia

 

Bia (October 2020 - August 2021)

Losing our beloved chicken Bia has been so hard. Sad, traumatic, shocking, scary. I knew we were all getting very attached to these 6 little chickies, but I had no idea just how much her death would rock us all until this past Monday, when she was apparently killed by a fox right next to our house, in the middle of the day. 

We'd been able to let these little ones roam free in our backyard for a couple carefree months, but now they're back to a life inside their (luxury) cage. So, on top of the sadness we're feeling for our loss, we've also got to deal with a nice cage-sized heap of guilt. 

Andrea and I made sure we had a little ceremony for Bia and we all go back to visit her grave whenever we want to say hi. We're trying really hard to follow the girls' lead - if they're nervous about leaving the chickens alone, one of us stays back. When Samina was out with a friend yesterday, I promised to check on them every 10 minutes (and did).

Going through this first very painful death as a family has been yet another learning moment for me. I know that the trauma of this experience is already something that has shaped the girls. I know that we have all been able to get through the past 18 months of covid life relatively scot-free thanks to our chicken friends and the lovely and loving distraction they've given us. Bia and her sisters have been a constant source of wonder, laughter and just something positive that we were able to associate to these hard times. The sudden pain of losing one of them seems to have put a crack in the fragile equilibrium she'd helped us create.

When I said goodbye to Bia, I promised her we would take good care of her sisters, and after a couple days of the girls being hesitant to visit with the remaining five, they are back in there, laughing and snuggling them. I am thankful for their resilience, but I also know that something in them - in all of us - has shifted. A consciousness of the fragility of life that not even 2 lockdowns, social distancing and constant mask wearing has really been able to bring home.

We will miss you Bia, and we will never forget you and the joy you brought to our little family. Rest in peace.

Meeting the chickens for the first time

Tiny chicks in the very early days

Sami with Bia

Bia's gorgeous little punim

Oops, Happy Belated Sofia!!

I can't believe how late I am to posting this for Sofia's 12th birthday...which was a month and a half ago (😅), but here I am!

Dearest Sofia,

I need to start this note by saying how proud I am/we are of you. It's incredible to me, how you have surpassed every idea we had of who you would be. You are so smart, caring, empathetic, curious, honest, geniune, silly, original, and beautiful - inside and out. Not a day goes by that I don't feel entirely fortunate to be your mom - to know you so well, to be trusted and loved by you, to be around to help you become the best Sofia you can possibly be - which you do, on a daily basis 💓

So, in honor of your (belated) 12TH BIRTHDAY, I'm here to document who you are right now in time.

Your current LOVES:
Our chickens, sushi, going to school, music, hanging out in (what will hopefully soon be) your room, conversations, watching movies/TV all together on the couch, swimming, going out, seeing friends, new clothes and finding your own style, family, playing board games together, sleeping in, new piano challenges, laughing (especially when your sissy makes you laugh), travel.

Your current HATES:
When your sister is being annoying (I could just repeat this one for the next 10 lines and it would pretty much cover everything you hate in a nutshell), when I am being annoying, when your papà gets mad at you, when we check in on you to make sure you're doing your homework, having to wake up early, not being able to go to school, Trump, seeing people sad, not being able to see your friends and family, injustice, scary or very emotional movies.

You never leave the lunch/dinner table without thanking whoever made lunch, you so carefully studied the chickens and helped us all realize they have their own very specific personalities. You are the first one there to make sure your sister's ok if she's crying or hurt. You don't often take no for an answer, but just between us I actually love that about you. I love our before-bedtime chats on your bed where I feel like we can just talk about anything and you will never tire of asking questions and truly, honestly listening to my answers. 

I continue to learn so much from you Sofia - about how to love and show love. Thank you so much for traveling through this weird life with me - letting me be by your side as you experience it all, and letting papà and Samina and I really *know* you.

We love you so much - and I am so sorry that your birthday is the last of all of ours so by the time we roll around to June 25th I apparently always forget to write these notes to you!!! 

Happy 12th, sweet Sofia.

Love,

Mommy (and Papà and Sami)