How is Sofia 14??

 Dearest Sofi,

Welp, here we are at 14! (somehow I missed a year and never posted for 13 - SORRY!!!)

Sometimes I catch a glimpse of you in your room or while you're concentrating on doing something important and I feel breathless...you are so poised, so beautiful, so grown and yet still my little Peanut. I love everything about you, even your stubborn head and fiery disposition which sometimes get us into trouble.

Your current favorites:

Sushi, being with your friends, finding your own style, experimenting with skin care and makeup, hanging out with your sister when you're actually getting along, having good friends, Gilmore Girls, Schitt's Creek with the family, being with family and friends who are family, hanging with your cousins, rollercoasters, hanging out in your room, Boba, experimenting in the kitchen, going out to restaurants, sitting shotgun in the car, music, swimming and your swim team group, sleeping in, being silly, cuddles.

Your current hates:

Having to wake up early, when I cook boring food, when papà or I are angry with you, when your sister is being annoying, when I dance in public, injustice of any kind, scary movies, when I am being too nosy, when your sister gets involved in our discussions (unless she's taking your side haha), going to doctors, feeling judged, cruelty and cruel people.

                                 

You are open-minded, kind, loyal, generous, curious, responsible, intelligent, joyful, empathetic, strong, self-aware, thoughtful, motivated, honest. You are 100% yourself - I don't think I've ever seen you pretend to be someone you're not. And watching you be fully yourself brings me such joy and relief and delight! You are a true force of nature, my baby girl. I hope you always remember that.

May this 14th year bring you new, amazing, sweet adventures and friendships and joy. This next year is sure to be very challenging (first year of high school, here she comes!) but there is no doubt in my mind that you are fully capable of handling it - and I promise that we will be there, through all of it, to help you where you need it, to celebrate you, to support and love you.

Happy birthday, sweet Peanut! You are so loved.

Love,

Mommy (and Papi and Sami)

                                

                               

                           

Future You

 I worry about this world you have to live in.

As the rain runs down my window and the thunder claps, at me.

Will you splash in the puddles, worry about your white sneakers?

Will you think of me as you wake up from a mid-day nap, on a hard fought day off?

Will you pick up your phone to text but think twice and rest it back down on your kitchen table?

I worry that the world's edges are too rough for you. 

I worry that I have made you too rough for the world's edges.

I close my eyes and see you, driving your second-hand car, distracted at a stop light.

I see you bounce your head to a familiar song, sunglasses shining on a July day.

You are alone in my future memories of you, but I don't know if that's by choice (yours or mine).

You smile, but it's a tired smile, that mixes with a yawn.

I think about what it would have taken to get you to this point. 

The fires that had to be put out. 

The standing around and holding back. The silence endured.

In my mind's eye, you change the radio station. 

The light changes, and you drive off.

Sami turns 11!

Dear Sami,

HAPPY 11th! 

Another year has gone by and I have so much to say to you!

We've had a great year filled with lots of amazing milestones. Mostly though, we were all happy to get back out into the world again - not without some problems (see: our very covid-y summer!) - but we made the very best of it.

 

You are turning into such a wonderful person, Sami. So bright and funny - your comic timing is just *chef's kiss*. You are empathetic and generous (when you want to be - which is cool by me), aware and intuitive, fun to be around, silly, sassy, and spicy. You march to the beat of your own drum and it thrills me to see you so much yourself, all the time. My hope for you is that middle school doesn't take that confidence away from you, but I have a hunch that - even if it disappears for a short stint - it will stay in there, at the sparkly core of who you are as a person.

Your current favorites:

Your new cell phone (!), your friends, spending time with family, makeup, gelato and candy, going to America, Ristorante Sun and all things sushi-gyoza, swimming and water, warm weather, playing outside with friends, Mario Kart, bowling, laughing, making up and telling jokes, watching Gilmore Girls with your sister and me, Star Wars, Squishmallows, your new Pandora bracelet, lip glosses, Groot, family movie nights, new shoes, drawing (you're especially good at Manga!), calcetto, watching youtube videos, singing and dancing (especially TikTok dances your friends have taught you!).

Your current dislikes:

Being told what to do, getting in trouble (especially for something you didn't do), cleaning up, being criticized, losing games of any kind, spending time with people you don't like, being bored, having to wear your grembiule (smock) to school, being forced to go to a different middle school from your friends next year, when your sister is mean to you, being forced to sit at a table listening to adults talk, most kinds of pizza, getting sick, homework during vacations, doing extra lessons for Problem Solving, reading books you don't like, having to go to bed when you're in the middle of something good on TV, having to wear your retainer, talking about your feelings.

Everything about you brings me joy -- even in the hard moments, when you take offense to something or we force you to clean up a room, that fire in you stirs pride in me and makes me feel like I know you are going to live a very special, great, significant life.

Sometimes when you're listing your names of "BFFs" you add me onto it, and it makes me smile. I know I go a little too easy on you sometimes (which is of absolutely no service to Future You), and sometimes I have to remind myself you're my buddy but I'm still your Mommy! But sometimes I can't seem to help it...seeing you happy is just so much fun for the rest of us.

Never, ever change, baby girl. Your father and sister and I will be right here next to you, chuckling at your jokes, mesmerized by you and so extremely proud of the person you are and are becoming. 

We love you, Pookie 💓